Tuesday at Noon: [Don't] Call Me.

It all started a few months back.

On my work voicemail one week, between calls from customers and managers, there were a smattering of messages from a school in Golden, Colorado, right up the road from where I work.

“Hello.  This is Patty Grubner from Helton Elementary School* with an update for you parents…”

The messages continued through the weeks with all sorts of school information. From bake sales, to lice outbreaks in a second grade classroom to my favorite, a bear cub spotted on the playground on a Sunday afternoon–”We are investigating this serious report with vigor and recess will be suspended until we figure out what’s going on…”–each message was very detailed and Patty would give a warning if it was going to be a long bout of information or just a quick update.  It was all mildly entertaining and I looked forward to hearing about the goings on at the school.

However, after this morning’s message complete with a thank-you to voters on passed measures affecting education in Colorado, I suddenly realized that if I’m getting these calls, perhaps an actual parent to a child attending the school is not.

I called Helton Elementary and spoke to Francis.

She said that unfortunately, the voicemail goes out to a list managed by the school’s IT services.  She took my number to see what she could do to get me off the list.  In the meantime, she assured me I should “hang tight” and enjoy the entertainment.

I hope I’m not off the list before the holidays.  Imagine all the exciting things that could happen at an elementary school as Christmas and Hanukkah approach!

And I’m still waiting on an update with the bear cub situation.

*All names have been changed to protect the innocent.  Lice?  Gross.

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