I have read a lot of borrowed books in my life.  But in fact, the library book I’m reading now is totally unique.  It’s not because it’s an especially well-written story or thrilling in subject.

This book is unique because it’s absolutely filthy with a previous reader’s schmutz.

I’m going to assume the gunk smeared over the chapters is food.

Dear heavens, I hope I’m correct.

I noticed it within the first few pages.  There a crusty something – maybe breakfast cereal, mussing chapter one.  This goes on through the first twenty pages.  Then onto lunch with something oily.  By the time I read through the middle of the novel, I saw what looked like cocoa powder, dried juice and then something orange (maybe powdered cheese from Cheetos?) staining the print.

I thought I may have caught a break and that the eating reader lost interest about two hundred pages into the book.  The smudges stopped.

Then, just as characters Marion and Kirby are about to meet in Chicago, there was dessert.

I am so grossed out.